I don’t ask for signs every day, but I ask for them quite often, especially when I’m struggling with something. Sometimes I receive signs without even asking. For example: last summer (at least I think it was last summer) I was having a bit of a rough day and doubting my self-worth. It was a day I was going to mow so I opened the shed doors, but was too distracted by my thoughts to hook them open. Amid my negative thoughts, the breeze picked up just enough to move the door so it whacked me upside the head. I remember laughing because I realized that it was my father and the universe telling me to snap out of it!
I had a similar experience another time when I was distracted by thoughts of self-doubt as I mowed the lawn. I was going by the shed and one of the many pinecones that fall from the tree there bounced off the shed front and bonked me in the head. Again, I laughed and shook my head at myself as the universe reminded me that I was being silly and that I was worth so much more than I believe sometimes.
Yesterday, I was worried about something and so I asked for a sign to help abolish my worry. I like to keep my options open sometimes so I asked to see a monarch, hawk or heron (three of my spirit guides) and if I did, that would reassure me that I was right in believing in the situation I was currently having doubts about. Alas, I didn’t see any of those three things on the way to or from my mother’s yesterday and my doubts closed in. Even so, I still wanted to believe and so I tried convincing myself that I’d just missed the sign. Nevertheless, one doesn’t miss signs, either I see them or I don’t.
Still filled with uncertainty, I came home and started getting the girls ready for bed. When I returned to the living room I realized that the sky outside seemed an odd pinkish color so I decided to walk out onto the deck. The sky was ablaze with the colors of sunset and I smiled at the clouds swirling across the horizon. As I looked up at the clouds, I realized that one of them strongly resembled a hawk in flight. I smiled as I realized that the universe was giving me my answer, just not in the way I had expected. Sometimes the universe knows that if they don’t show me something in a way that resembles a bright, blinking neon sign, I might miss it. Yesterday was apparently one of those times.
I know that I should just let go of my worries and believe, but I’m not perfect and it’s an ongoing challenge for me. I spent so much of my life feeling secure and confident in so many things that eventually slipped through my grasp that my faith and trust waivers. Yet I always believe in my signs and I know they’ll continue to reveal themselves to me as I continue on the journey to believing in the element of my life I so often ask them about.