Just a day

One of my favorite pics of my dad and I

One of my favorite pics of my dad and I

I don’t speak for anyone else who has lost their father, I’m only sharing how I feel. Father’s Day is hard for me. My dad died in October of 2009 and I miss him every day. He and I were about as close as a father and daughter could be and he loved and accepted me unconditionally. His passing left a hole in my heart so big I’m surprised I can’t hear the wind howling through it sometimes.

Seeing all the commercials and advertisements for Father’s Day hasn’t made things any easier and I’ll be relieved when they’re done. When my father was alive, I happily celebrated him with gifts and cards and he appreciated whatever he received, even if it was just a hug. But now Father’s Day is just a day I do my best to get through by remembering my father fondly without shedding too many tears.

I encourage everyone who still has their father to cherish every moment with him, hug him tighter and tell him you love him as often as possible. Never take anyone you love for granted because tomorrow isn’t guaranteed, all we can be sure of is today.

Visiting my father's marker, 10/21/2012

Visiting my father’s marker, 10/21/2012

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What I Remember

Image courtesy of Pinterest

Today is a day of remembrance. I don’t know that I can say anything that hasn’t been said by countless other voices but I’ll try. September 11th, 2001 was a day when I learned a lot about the world I live in.

I don’t watch the morning news so I didn’t know what was going on until after I’d already been at work for an hour and my boss came in. At the time I worked as a secretary for a lawyer. His little building was literally across the street from the apartment I was living in at the time so I walked to work. My boss said something about a plane crashing into the World Trade Center Towers and my first thoughts were “what and where is the World Trade Center?” and “oh, it was probably a little private plane.”

A few minutes later I checked the internet to see what he was talking about and I saw footage of the first plane crashing into the tower. A lump formed in my throat, tears welled in my eyes and my heart sunk into my feet. I stared in disbelief at what I was seeing. Those huge towers made the planes look so small but I knew there were countless lives in danger and already lost. Then when I saw the second plane crash into the other tower, time seemed to stop. None of it made sense, none of it felt real.

I did not personally know any of the victims of the 9/11 attacks but we’re all living creatures and such a monumental loss of life was devastating. Amazing stories came out of that day of selfless heroes and the uniting of people not just in New York, Pennsylvania and DC but all over the world.

I remember a week later there was an observed moment of silence. I heard the bells chiming from the multiple churches of the town I worked in. I stepped out the front door of the office, closed my eyes and just listened. I sent my prayers to all those who had lost their lives, their families and everyone recovering from the events of that day. I counted my blessings and had faith that somehow, someday, things would be okay again.