October Already?!

October sky

Evening sky during our walk yesterday.

My oldest daughter went through the house last night flipping all the calendars to October because I hadn’t yet. I’m still trying to adjust to the fact that October is here already. September went by very fast and while it started out fall-like, there was a lot of summer heat in the middle and end of the month that made everything seasonally confusing. The poor trees that had started to change colors during the first bout of cool weather didn’t know what to do once summer heat returned. A lot of them just seemed to give up and start dropping leaves without much color change and I fear it won’t be a very colorful autumn this year. Nonetheless, leaves are still changing and falling and autumn is tied for spring with my favorite season.

As I wrote in last year’s blog post at the start of October, I’m finally able to welcome October again. Losing my father in October of 2009 made it difficult for me to truly embrace what had until that point been my favorite month and season. On the 21st of this month it will have been eight years since his passing and that doesn’t even seem possible to me. While I still miss him every single day and there will always be a void inside me without him here, I’ve healed enough to understand that his spirit wants me to be happy. I’m sure there will be the usual random bouts of crying and sadness throughout the month, but I know it won’t be as overwhelming as it’s been in the past. Life is about moving forward and not allowing yourself to be stuck in a moment that can’t be changed.

I don’t know what this October will bring, but I’m looking forward to it. I never really know what each day will bring. I have a plan for the day and most of the time it follows a predictable routine. But honestly, every single day is full of amazing new experiences and gifts and I make sure I take the time to notice them and feel grateful for them. I’m sure October will be full of new adventures and of course my favorite holiday of Halloween. Maybe I’ll make it to a Halloween party of some type this year, one never knows! Whatever comes this October and beyond, I know that I’ll get through it just like I always do, with strength, determination, optimism, and hope.

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Welcoming October

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I don’t know about you, but I love October and the autumn changes it brings. The weather turns cooler, the leaves become vibrant in shades of red, orange and yellow and it’s time to bring out the warm blankets and hot drinks.

A couple of year’s ago, I wouldn’t have said, let alone felt, that I love October but much has changed. October has been a difficult month since my father died in October of 2009 but now, 7 years later, I can finally say that I love October again. I loved it before my father died because I enjoy Halloween with its magical time of glowing moons, black cats and flying bats. Although I’ll always miss my father’s physical presence, I know his spirit is always with me. His spirit and my own soul want me to embrace October and banish the sadness that’s overshadowed it for so many years.

This past summer proved far more challenging than I expected with everything that happened with my youngest daughter. Along with that, my circle of friends became smaller for various reasons, but the close friends I still have will always have my back like I have theirs. That’s how friendship works.

Overall, I’m as optimistic as I always am and I have faith that the universe has great things in store for me this October and for all the months to come. So I hope you join me in welcoming October and all the amazing changes it brings!